When Law of Attraction Fails
Have you ever noticed that the Law of Attraction works for you in some areas of your life but not all? People often ask me “If the Law of Attraction actually works, why doesn’t it work for all of us all of the time?” My sister Debbie and I were talking about this recently and I just HAD to share her answer with you:
There’s only one answer to that question: It is what is in our unconscious mind that has the power — all the stuff that you wish wasn’t there, that you want to get rid of, that you’re still pissed off about or ashamed of, all the beliefs you’re still limited by.
Our unconscious is holding 80% of our power to magnetize our life experiences to us. So if our conscious mind has only 20% of the power, this is the time to get to work on uncovering, owning and embracing our unconscious by truly understanding and transforming what’s no longer wanted or needed.
One fruitful place to start this exploration is to look at what I call underlying commitments. These are commitments that exist at an unconscious level that, if not made conscious, will override any other desires we have.
Our underlying commitments drive our thoughts, our beliefs and — most importantly — our choices. They are the unseen forces that shape our realities. They are responsible for the discrepancy between what we say we want and what we’re actually experiencing.
These underlying commitments are formed by unconscious decisions we’ve made in the past. In the dark recesses of your unconscious, for example, you may have decided that you can’t trust anyone and that it’s easier to be alone. So even though you want love and intimacy in your life, you always choose the wrong mate because your first commitment is to being by yourself.
You become a magnet, but instead of attracting what you think you desire, you are a magnet for failure, for missed opportunities, for being less of a success than you strive for. You continually make choices that are in direct conflict with what you say you want and you find yourself baffled by the choices you are making. Sound familiar?
Underlying commitments keep us stuck in the same place year after year. When we carry the wounds, hurts or outdated beliefs that created these underlying commitments in the first place, we will unfortunately keep attracting the same circumstances over and over again so that we can be right about these early decisions lurking in our unconscious. Our underlying commitments become self-fulfilling prophecies. And our unconscious becomes the driver of our lives.
Transformational Action Step
We must expose our underlying commitments before we have the power to shift them. By exposing these unconscious commitments, we gain the freedom to stand in the truth. Then we can begin the process of transformation.
1. Write down a goal or desire that you’ve been unable to attain.
2. Make a list of the actions you have taken or not taken in the past year that are in direct opposition to this goal.
3. Now take your list and imagine that these choices that have taken you away from your desired goal and not brought you any closer to it are an expression of a deeper commitment, your first commitment.
4. Close your eyes and ask yourself “What commitment are these choices in direct alignment with?” There you will discover your underlying commitment.
When you reveal the underlying commitments that prevent you from achieving your goals, you are beginning to turn your life around. You can now replace your old commitments with new, powerful commitments that are in alignment with your highest vision for the future.
5. Write down a new commitment you can make this week that will move you toward the future you desire.
Take some time this week to do these steps and begin to make progress on unraveling your underlying commitments. And, if you are interested in going even deeper with this type of process, Debbie is the originator of a magnificent, life-changing, life-enhancing workshop called The Shadow Process. Learn all about it here: Shadow Process
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I know what you mean when you say, “The Law of Attraction works for you in some areas of your life but not all”. But just to clarify, it does work in all areas of your life. You just may not recognize that it is working exactly as you have “set it up” to work. By decision or by default, the law of attraction works in all areas of your life. It is just best to do as you have said, to ‘set it up’ so you get the desired results. Not leave it to chance or old incorrect settings.
Very good article that is also in support of my view that the law of attraction is not a magic trick you do – one needs to take a constructive approach in order to make it work! I am a fan of writing exercises such as the one you have detailed in your article, and I do include them in my E-books, too, but what I would also like to add is that being detached from the end result is of uppermost importance, too. Being overly focused on getting the result you want actually has the opposite effect, as you are not living in the present and not taking the necessary steps NOW.